from New Times Los Angeles     'earwax' column 

September 5-11, 2002        www.newtimesla.com

SIDE DOORS

You want to honor the past, to respect the history of rock 'n' roll and all that, you really do.  But sometimes it gets so damn hard, especially when the history of rock 'n' roll willfully refuses to respect itself.

There's the Levi's/KROQ Inland Invasion 2, for starters.  The show, as you've no doubt heard, features "25 years of punk" -- from the Sex Pistols and X and TSOL to Bad Religion and the Offspring to New Found Glory and co-headliners Blink-182 -- all on one mega-festival bill next weekend at the Blockbuster Pavilion.  Which means, clearly, that punk rock is now officially the frat-rock for the new millennium.  Never mind the Steve Miller Band, brah, here's the Sex Pistols!

To recap:  Sex Pistols and Blink-182.  Sponsored by Levi's.  Booked by Clear Channel.  Tickets 35 bucks -- plus Ticketmaster charges.  Show held at Blockbuster-fucking-Pavilion.  Dude!  How punk is that?

And then there's this:  The Doors are getting back together.

Yeah, those Doors.  Well, some of them.  This weekend.

Let's be plain:  The Doors were a seminal band, Jim Morrison's pretentious streak notwithstanding.  But Morrison, for those without VH1, has spent the last 31 years at Pere-Lachaise cemetery in Paris.   Which, you know, ought to make a Doors reunion a tough prospect.

But not that tough, apparently.  Seems the band has tapped Ian Astbury of the Cult to sing lead vocals at this weekend's Harley-Davidson 100th Anniversary Open Road festival out at the California Motor Speedway, and they're calling the affair the return of the Doors.  Never mind that there's a Cult figure where the cult figure once was, standing in front of Ray Manzarek on keys, Robby Krieger on guitar and John Densmore on drums.

"No, John Densmore can't play," says Manzarek.

Say again?

"John Densmore can't play.  His ears have gone bad.  He has tinnitus.  He can't play rock 'n' roll.   The cymbals are too loud."

OK then.  So Astbury will front a Doors lineup of Manzarek and Krieger (I checked, Krieger's definitely on board) and, it turns out, Stewart Copeland of the Police on drums.  Which means that not only is the show two pieces away from an actual Doors reunion, it's also two pieces away from a Police reunion, though they're not billing it as such.  Here's they way they are billing it, per Manzarek:  "It's the Doors for the 21st century.  Or, as we like to say, the Doors have retooled for the 21st century."

So there you have it -- the Doors, refined and retooled for the ...

"No, not refined.  Re-tooled for the 21st century.  So put that in the article.  'Doors Retool for the 21st Century.'"

Uh, all right then.  Doors.  Re.  Tool.  But the question you're asking -- and it's a fine question -- is, well, why?

"The stars were in proper alignment for the Doors to get back together again," says Manzarek, doing his level best to fritter away any and all respect he earned as possibly his old band's biggest talent and the producer of X's best work.  "We've entered the 21st century and the new age is approaching, and we badly need a glimpse of the new age." 

Um...

"Just put it down like that -- you know, the new age is approaching and we need a glimpse of the new age very badly in this age of darkness and war and destruction of the environment."

All right, let's rephrase the question.  Exactly how many Doors have to be absent before they become a Doors tribute band, albeit a really convincing Doors tribute band?

"The Doors are not a Doors tribute band," says Manzarek.  "If you want to see a Jim Morrison imitation, go see Wild Child.  If you want to see the Doors, the new Doors" -- say it with him -- "retooled for the 21st century, come and see the Doors.  Ian Astbury is singing Doors songs as Ian Astbury.  He's not doing a Jim Morrison imitation.  He is Ian Astbury, with all the power that he has."

But why Astbury, if not because he can do a hell of a Jim Morrison?  "Ian is a great singer, has a shamanistic quality to him, has Buddhist sensibilities, and is an advocate of Native American rights."

So ... "So he shares the same sensibilities as Jim Morrison."

Uh, right.   But he's not Jim Morrison.  And without Jim (and, oh yeah, John, uh, Densmore), it's not really the Doors, is it?  I mean, the only place they're going to hold a real Doors reunion is at Pere-Lachaise, right?

"Well, that's fine, then don't come," says Manzarek.  "All I can say is don't come.  If you don't want to hear us play 'Light My Fire.'  'Riders on the Storm.'  And 'Roadhouse Blues.'  Don't come!"

Hey, he said it, not me.

by Dan Reines

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